[I troubleshoot internet issues for an ISP.] Today I got a customer that called in stating she cannot get on the internet. I asked her if she gets an error message when she tries to get on a web-site. She said she does not get an error message and her computer will not even turn …
Monthly Archive: March 2010
Mar 03
Overly Technical
Everyone has different levels of understanding for computers but sometimes people make me wonder how they breathe, much less use their computer. I troubleshoot computer issues for a major PC manufacturer. I once asked a customer to press the power button located on the front of her PC tower and she responded with, “Don’t you …
Tags: Call Center, Tech Support
Mar 03
Customer Service Fights Back
[I work for a credit card company in customer care taking escalated calls.] Calling this guy an idiot is being nice. I’ll give you the short version. Some general facts about his credit card before we get started: 1. Balance was $17,300+ 2. Minimum payment due about $519 3. NOT a business card and expressly …
Mar 03
Screw-On Power
[I work for a cable company and do over the phone trouble shooting for video service problems.] The customer called in complaining that the interactive guide was no longer providing information and just stated NO DATA in all the spaces. After all the initial trouble shooting steps it became necessary to reboot the satelite box. …
Mar 03
Hissing Phone
[I work for a phone company. Often I get customers that call in with problems that they think are our fault and they refuse to realize it is not.] The customer proceeds to explain that there is a strange hissing sound on the phone now all the time. She states that it has been going …
Mar 03
Racist Ignoramus
[One of my co-workers sitting next to me in our credit card call center, has an obvious southern accent and got a racist ignoramus on the phone. I have to let you know my co-worker was fresh to the phones from training, so didn’t know the systems real well yet. We will call her Mary …
Mar 03
Dirty PlayStation
[When working for a major electronics company’s return and exchange department I had some interesting encounters with idiot customers.] This one was a real winner. He brings in a Playstation and sits it down on the counter and states he wants a new one because it doesn’t work. Looking at the Playstation it is covered …
Mar 03
Twelve O-Clock?
[I worked for a movie theatre when I was a teenager and this is my favorite Idiot Customer!] The patron walked up to me and asked: “What time does the twelve o-clock showing of Dances with Wolves start?” Completely bewildered and a little confused I answered the question, “Twelve o-clock.” Patron: “Thank you.” WTF?!
Tags: Movie Theatre
Mar 03
Lower APR
[As you read this, keep in mind that we are calling business owners with an existing business credit card, carrying a balance and are offering to lower the rate on the existing balance and with their permission change them from a Visa to a Mastercard to achieve this.] Marketer: Hello, my name is ——- —— …
Tags: Call Center, Telemarketer
Mar 02
Do Not Call!
[I monitor calls for a telemarketing company. I could not believe this inbound call. The rep really kept her cool.] Customer: I want you to quit calling my house. Remove me from your do not call list! Rep: I am sorry you have been bothered by our calling you. I would be happy to add …